classic wind up merchant

taking the piss again

he says

classic wind up merchant

& you think

I asked straight

that is all I do?

he looks puzzled now

yeah y’know

I’m never sure if you’re serious

you say the most strange things

joking around

pushing at the edges

making me think about stuff

I wouldn’t ordinarily do or

think on about

just supposin’ I ventured

I was to say those things

with a straight way

out front up close?

well then

I’d think you were

downright rude obnoxious

crazy even…

so mebbe

this is why I say these things

in the way I do?

there y’go man he says

you’re doing it again….

there was something

there was something

about auras

how we could mix them

make us a stronger team

there was something

about dreams

how we’d always been together

mother son sister lover brother

everything past

& to come had been

there was something

about wishing

making the future turn out

the way it need be

not for greed for love

& it seemed

there was always something

about Do

rather than Be

letting life create itself

taking a breath

accepting the river

the streams


back when she fed me

out of date food from her mothers’ shop

boxes of snacks battered tins

& I was grateful for that largesse

& now

I visited her about a year

before she died

took her & her deadbeat man out

bought drinks & a meal

he snuffled it all right up

king for the day

later she apologised

for his appetite

manners or lack of

& I reminded her the beggar

there once at her door

oh that was different she laughed

you made me feel good about that

but this…?

maybe I said one day he’ll wake

get out there in the world

find the thing he loves

become the man he once was again

& all she did was sigh

& later at her funeral

he sat with me

telling me how like me he was

& I had to agree

we did both love the same woman

to start loving

under a big bright blue sky

I told you I had to go

could not stay

& you said

you were just about

to start loving me

but hey

follow the sun

fill up your heart

just don’t let a bitter thing

like a late flowering love

get in your way

sometimes words are not enough

I tried I felt

maybe you did deserve more


we could not even make it as friends

but hey

don’t let truth

get in your way

I was bored again

late summer about six

I was bored again

my woman had left months ago

& of course I was broke

I started in back of the sofa

going through old pockets

the pennies started mounting up

& then there in amongst the lint

an old hit of blotter acid donald duck

I put it under my tongue continued searching

finally I had just enough for a bottle of cider

but first the wait give it an hour

which came & went with nothing

resigned I set out for the store

walking the empty streets feeling the sun

wanting so much more

& then

just as the door opener went ting!

the rush came on

I was underwater

in a green room filled with bottles

feet stuck to the ocean floor

& a grinning man saying


I began counting pennies

into a mountain on the counter

what else could that be for?


one of those I said pointing

green bottles high to the sky






he asked aching slow

with a leer


green & red things

grow on trees

picked in autumn

crushed squeezed

to make drinks

cider he intoned

you want cider?



that’s it

in a brown bottle

here are pennies enough

to purchase

he thrust the nectar at me

& I began the slow cakewalk

back to the door

along the undulating pavement

to my castle

here somewhere in this enchanted land

but first the quest

to find the keys

to my kingdom

& then

I remember no more

beauty is never enough

I looked at her

lived with for a while

thought it was love

time passed pushed all that

apart flat

I had grown colder

had gotten over

her beauty

wanted to get out

fast as I could

& she felt rejected

could not understand

was her beauty not enough?

up until then she

had always been the one

to say goodbye

& was moving on

there was something wrong with me

didn’t I understand?

this is not how things had to be

but I’d mourned for her

the who I had thought she was

while living with yet growing apart

& I know I hurt her

more than her heart

wrenched her head in a new way

which I had not foreseen

or intended to do

& for that

she vowed to make me hurt

beauty will do that

when it feels crushed

will make you pay